5 entries found for anger.
an·ger ( P ) Pronunciation Key (nggr)
A strong feeling of displeasure or hostility.
v. an·gered, an·ger·ing, an·gers
To make angry; enrage or provoke.
To become angry: She angers too quickly.
If there is any one thing I've taken from my first marriage and placed in my back pocket, it is the remarkable fact that I am not responsible for another persons anger. In fact, I'm not responsible for another person's...ANYTHING!
The dictionary interpretation of the emotion is objectively correct. Anger is a strong feeling of displeasure, or hostility. However, that which she was feeling was not the result of anything I did, thought, or said.
Here's where Miriam Webster goes on her course of misdirected objectivity. "To make angry; enrage or provoke", is not my responsibility. She accomplished that on her own. I was molded for years to believe that everything she perpetrated on my children and me, was my fault. If we continue to believe that their actions are the result of our behaviors, then our entire existence is based on egg-shell-walking. I don't know about you, but living under those conditions creates a life full of anxiety and stress.
Here's the last part of the Webster's pitch: "To become angry: She angers too quickly": her angering too quickly is on her. Any excuse was a reason to emotionally, or physically damage another.
The bottom line is when we as Survivors, or as victims of current abuse, realize that our responsibility is about how we feel and react to those feelings, then we will begin to recover. Angerrrrr is a secondary emotion. Anger is a result of frustration, and/or fear. The questions are: "Am I able to intelligently communicate?", "What am I afraid of?", "How much more am I willing to ingest before I become so crippled that I'm not capable of clawing my way from the pit I've allowed myself to be placed in?"
Information is freeing! Education is enlightening! Ignorance is NOT bliss!